Signs of an Emotionally Controlling Boyfriend

When a woman enters into a relationship, she expects the best. She probably picked a man that is handsome, has a great sense of humour, and can handle just about anything. They think he is the perfect man, until suddenly she notices some aspects in the relationship that simply aren't right. Knowing the signs of an emotionally controlling boyfriend can help women to stay away from this type of man and find out how to fix the abuse and finally, if necessary, leave the relationship altogether. When looking at controlling behaviour it's worth noting that in many cases the behaviour may escalate, getting worse over time. Partially because the boyfriend finds that he can get away with what he is doing.

Usually the first sign sign that a woman is engaging in a relationship with a controlling boyfriend is when he begins to isolate the woman from her friends, family, and co-workers. This isolation may start out slow, with dates being held in secluded environments such as the home or park, but it will eventually become worse. The controlling boyfriend will badmouth the people in her life, trying to manipulate the woman into thinking these people are bad and into deciding to separate from friends. In his mind she will then stay with and rely only on him. 

A controlling boyfriend will typically engage in verbal abuse. In this situation, the controller use derogatory names in order to 'keep her in line'. They may say it is a joke or the woman is being too sensitive. While performing the act of verbal abuse he intends to diminish her self-esteem.Then he will have an easier time controlling all aspects of his girlfriend's life as she will feel obligated to listen to him in order to feel worthy.

Controlling boyfriends will be jealous of literally everything you do. From the smallest phone call with a loved one to spending any time away from him, they will not like it. He will constantly ask his girlfriend who she is talking to, who she is spending time with, and so on. He will not want his girlfriend to spend any time with her girl friends (or guy friends) and will not even want his woman to get a text from another man. The only way to satisfy his jealousy is to listen to his demands and not talk or hang out with anyone but him and those he believes is OK for her to speak with. In some cases the jealousy becomes so bad that he will demand she get rid of her cellphone or move in with him, and resort to physical abuse if she does not obey him.

A boyfriend with a controlling personality will never want other men to look at his girlfriend. For this reason, they will typically tell their girlfriend what they can and cannot wear, how they do their hair, how much makeup to wear, and so on. If they see their girlfriend wearing something showy while he is not around, they will get mad and demand she change her clothes. On the other hand, they will also expect their woman to look great for them at all times and become very angry if their girlfriend gains weight or cuts their hair in a way they do not like.

Controlling boyfriends will, in most cases, punish their girlfriend's for doing something they believed was not alright. For instance, if the woman is waiting in the parking lot for her boyfriend and after an hour she decides to leave, the next time he sees her, the consequences could be disastrous. While a 'normal' boyfriend would apologize for the delay, the controlling boyfriend would get angry and probably accuse his girlfriend of cheating, which leads to the final sign of an emotionally controlling boyfriend.

During a controlling boyfriend's strive to control his girlfriend, one thing that is an essential element is the act of accusing his girlfriend every chance he gets. Controlling boyfriends will accuse his girlfriend at every opportunity. For instance, if she gets a text from a platonic guy friend saying 'Hi, how are you?' the controller will automatically believe and accuse his girlfriend of cheating and demand she stop speaking to the platonic male friend. 




writer picture by